Woke up this morning and realized it was Weigh in Wednesday. I ventured downstairs to the scale and proceeded to step on it............Really??? Down 1 lb. One little lb. Not exactly what I was hoping for since I have laid off soda for the enitre week but I guess it is still considered good news since it is minus 1 and plus 0.
I remember the first time I was told I was "fat". I was sitting in choir class in the 6th grade and the girl sitting next to me put her hands around her thigh and was able to touch her thumb to thumb and forefinger to forefinger in a circle around her very skinny thigh. She said, "I bet you can't do that". I, of course, could not. So starts the self conscious feelings of being overweight. Through out junior high, high school, and college, I maintained a pretty good weight. It wasn't near what the medical field would consider "normal" but I was comfortable. I exercised some. Volleyball in the fall, softball in the spring, church softball and walks in the summer.
The problem started when I got married and went to the store and could buy whatever I wanted without mom standing behind me telling me no. It was doughnuts, pop tarts, and chocolate milk for breakfast. Then comes the realization that I can drive to McDonald's by myself for lunch, and dinner, and midnight snack, and breakfast the next morning. When I became pregnant, I was eating for TWO now. Therefore, I needed doughnuts, pop tarts, and chocolate milk times two. After three pregrancies that would mean that I was eating alot of food. The only exercise I ever did after college was restling dogs and mean cats for their vaccinations and carrying around 10 lb babies.
The thing that bothers me the most is that I am heavier now than I was when I was pregnant with my last child. It has been 4 years since I had that last child. Technically, I don't think I can keep saying "I just had a baby and this is still my pregnancy weight".
Since my day didn't start off with the numbers I had been wanting why don't we just keep that trend going throughout the rest of the day. So I go to KMart......to buy a swimsuit.......where the numbers were also not what I was wanting. I took three suits, in three different sizes into the dressing room. I started out with the smaller size, and then went to the next size, and finally had to settle on the third size I had selected which was a high number. Thus went my mood straight into the toilet. I decided just now that there are a couple of bright sides to this excursion to KMart: 1. I have a swim suit for an upcoming vacation. 2. I am even more motivated now than ever to lose this weight. Bad news is that I just spent $30 on a swimsuit that I am hoping I will not be able to wear next summer.
I know that I won't wake up the next morning and poof the weight has disappeared. Although that would be really cool. I know that I have to work on it to get rid of it. It took me years to put on and it may take me years to take off but; I need to start somewhere. I know that I can't do it just by eating better, that I need to exercise as well. So, here's to using what I do know and making a better try of it this next week.
testing....
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